D.C. (CNN) – December 2008
light of the recent downturn in the American economy,
the nation’s jazz musicians have joined the long line
of lobby groups looking to Washington for support as the
economy slides into a deepening recession.
jazz industry is asking Washington for a bailout package
and major subsidies on par with that of the auto sector.
As such, jazz musicians also want access to credit and
tax breaks to stimulate investment and help the development
of new recording and performance opportunities.
recession has really got me dragged, ya dig?” says Luther
“Hip Bones” Jones III, a New York City saxophonist and
a cornerstone of the little known Wall Street Avant-Garde
mean, now that gigs aren’t a flowin’ like they used, I
actually have to get up before noon and find a way to
make some coin!”
Jones’ associate Willie “Fat Cheeks” Hughes comments that
with the economy in near chaos, the demand for his jazz
bagpipe skills has waned considerably.
Hughes also comments that with a sluggish economic situation,
he will soon have to find another girlfriend or else face
this crisis has been brewing for some time, a recent spike
in the number of trombonists delivering pizzas in New
York’s Greenwich Village has recently brought this dire
situation to the public’s attention.
week, however, jazz advocate Wynton Marsalis met with
President George W. Bush and the White House economic
team to discuss the worsening situation for America’s
jazz artists and a possible stimulus package.
was quoted as saying: “I think it’s important for the
government to understand that our musical recession has
actually been worsening since the demise of New York’s
52nd Street scene in the early 50’s and thanks to the
racket these kids call “Hip Hop”. They really should have
seen this coming. Once Miles went electric, it’s all been
down hill.” As Marsalis continued, “I think that a strong
monetary stimulus package and a mandatory listening of
Duke Ellington records should encourage a healthy economic
Bush responded to these comments by replying that: “Mr.
Margolis has a very good point here. The country will
be in dire straights if we lose our “jazzy” beats. I mean,
personally, I always enjoy a little Kenny G in the evening
while I try to woo the First Lady.”
also commented that a global consensus on the state of
the jazz economy will have to be reached. “The way things
stand; America’s jazz artists just can’t compete with
the lower paid jazz artists currently flooding the market
related news: America’s Blues musicians report an increase
in depressing lyrics. “Indicates a reflection of the times”
claims one downtrodden guitarist whose wife recently left
him and whose dog has died.